An Old Blog: Parma

Michele and Pamela took me to Parma today, and it was so much fun! Not only was today gorgeous, but Parma was a wonderful little city. I forgot my camera, but I think I’m going to spend next weekend there and I’ll be sure to take pictures.

We visited the Duomo di Parma, which translates to “freaking-big-church of Parma.” Now, I just saw two churches in France and was duly impressed by their grandeur – tall, with ornate designs in the columns and the numerous conclaves for the saints. But this Italian church: wow. If it weren’t so impressively old and religious, I would go as far to say that it was downright gaudy. The ceilings, walls, columns were covered with gorgeous religious frescoes. The altars and conclaves were so ornate, the iron (bronze?) work was intricate … I can’t even begin to describe this church. It wasn’t what I was expecting; I thought it would be exactly the same as the French churches. Some of the architecture was similar (18 m vaulted ceilings), but the decoration was just incredible. (I’m starting to understand why the Europeans might think Americans are stupid – we walk around Europe with our mouths hanging open).

We continued to walk around Parma, checking out the opera house and the old Duke’s Palace – which was incredible. Part of it was destroyed in World War II, and it was downright shocking to see the destruction. As I explained to Pamela, we Americans all know someone who fought in the war – grandpas, mostly – but though we might see the impact the war had on those around us, there is no physical evidence of it. It was shocking to see the destruction, especially so close to my new residence; it made the war, or the general idea of war, more real for me. No surprise, I still don’t like it.

The most interesting facet of this morning’s adventure was talking with Pamela. We discussed the politics of America and Italy, the new racism that is popping up in Italy, and the culture of the different parts of our respective countries. Allow me to break it down:

Politics: Unlike America, which has two major political parties, Italy has many, many political parties. Right now, they are mostly all separated into two groups; however, according to Michele, there are more differences between two parties in one of these groups than there are between the American Republican and Democratic parties. He made the point that both American parties are based on some basic understandings. For example, in America, we don’t discuss the idea that humans deserve human rights, or that capitalism is the way to go – these are basic ideas upon which our government was founded. In Italy, this is not so.

Racism: Riding the bus this morning, I had a first-hand look at the new racism in Italy. A black woman got on the bus with her crying child. This prompted an older Italian woman to make some comments about blacks in Italy. I won’t repeat what she said (largely because I only understood half of it), but Pamela told me later that, though this was the most blatant display she’s seen, this racism is common in Italy. About 15 years ago, there was a sudden influx of immigrants from the south – e.g., Africa. Because the Italians have never had to live with other cultures before, this is creating some particularly racist tension in the country. [I’m so happy that my host family is modern and open-minded – I got lucky for sure.] I did my best to explain to Pamela how racism in America was different. However, I got a little stuck. Unlike the Italians, different cultures are a part of the American culture (the melting pot, and all that), but if the color of one’s skin or religion isn’t an assault on other’s culture, where does the prejudice originate? Perhaps I’m way off the mark, or being naïve, but I could use some feedback on this topic.

Marriage: I was quite stunned to find out that Pamela and Michele are unmarried. I know Pamela has a different last name, but the Italian women do not take their husband’s last name, so I thought nothing of it. However, Pamela explained that in the north, this was no big deal. The Roman Catholic priest had a few things to say when Filippo was baptized, but my host family is not shunned because of this. Things would be quite different in the south, however. Of course, anyone who knows me understands that I have absolutely no problem with their unmarried state; I come from a family in which the parents were unmarried for a length of time. However, the news really overturned my perception of the family with which I am living.

This conversation about marriage prompted discussion of the differences between Northern and Southern Italy. I was not surprised to hear that there was quite a cultural difference between the two parts of the country. Italy wasn’t politically united until relatively recently (about 150 years ago). I also wasn’t too surprised to hear that the south contains a lot more traditional Italian families. It was Pamela who was surprised to hear that the U.S. had its own pockets of “backwards” peoples. She was under the misconception that everywhere in America was modern and rich (and thereby, educated).

So I’m starting to truly understand how learning about new cultures helps you learn more about your own. Fascinating. I’m very lucky that I found a family that is willing to have these conversations with me.

I’d also like to say how weird it is to be living with Michele. Not only does he look shockingly like my father, but he’s also a mechanical engineer and shares many traits with my dad. If I have any latent daddy issues, this next year might get very interesting.

…that last part was a joke, in bad taste (my dad would probably like it).

Now I think I’ll enjoy the weather by walking around Sala Baganza in hopes of finding a bar (café) in which to study my Italian.